In 2016, my family adopted two cats, Fina and Blanca, from a shelter in Nashville. We agreed on adopting two females, thinking my sister and I could each get close to one, and no cat nor human would feel left out.

But eight years later, I still feel guilty for abandoning their brother, Leche.

It’s not just him. Many cats in shelters still don’t have a loving home – in fact, nine cats at the Humane Society and 59 at the Memphis Animal Services (MAS) are waiting to be adopted at the time this article was published. 

The stray situation is just as concerning. Last year, a feral cat colony in a Memphis neighborhood vandalized residents’ vehicles and outdoor furniture. Some locals claim the cats have lived in the area for years and have not been rescued, despite their destructive behavior.

There’s a cat crisis in town. Too many cats are fighting every day to survive on the dangerous city streets, and the ones lucky enough to be rescued by a shelter are not getting adopted quickly enough.

The stigma around cats could be a reason for their low levels of adoption. 

While there are definitely cat-lovers out there, including myself, there are some who tend to vastly misunderstand them.

Cats are unfairly deemed as merciless, unloving and evil, while dogs are considered “man’s best friend.” Just try Googling “cats are evil.”

But it’s wrong to assume how these animals act, as every cat is different, just as any dog is.

Though more subtle than dogs in their ways of showing love, cats are capable of having just as strong a bond with humans.

That’s why when the Ramsers, who already own three cats, rescued and took in Junior, a black and white male cat, they completely turned his life around–from suffering on the streets to thriving in a loving home.

Sophomore Jilly Ramser remembers the moment when she first saw Junior.

“We nursed him to health,” Ramser said, “and when he was healthy, you just have a connection with the cats when you save them, it’s just like you have to take care of them.”

Despite her warm welcome to Junior, he was hesitant to show the same affection.

“Cats who were from the street are kind of clearly standoffish when it comes to people,” she said. “It’s like they don’t want to be picked up, they jump a lot easier.”

The background of these animals also has a major effect on their behavior. Trauma may cause anxiety in cats, which manifests in habits such as attempting to flee when frightened, hiding and aggressiveness.

However, if a cat is aggressive or reserved, Ramser advises to give them time and space, considering what their experiences could have been.

“They don’t always have good experiences with humans and they’re not always going to treat you the best,” she said. “So you have to be…really patient with them especially if …they’ve been through some trauma.”

It took almost a year for me to get close to my cat, Blanca. At first, if I stroked her in a way that slightly bothered her, she would hiss and jump out of my arms. She was so skittish, that she would hide under the bed or couch for hours at any noise she deemed too loud.

This happened so often that I was positive I would never get close to her.

Now I can proudly say that she trusts me enough to pet her, pick her up and play with her. 

Like any relationship, it takes time and patience to create a strong connection. It takes respecting boundaries, knowing when the other needs time alone and forgiving when you don’t get the reaction you hoped for.

Maybe that’s why people deem cats as “mean” and dogs as “loving.” But the trial and error required to get close with cats makes them more like people, and that’s what makes having a trustworthy relationship with them so special.